On Billboards and Grand Gestures: Is Courtship Dead?
How I love a grand gesture! Long ago, Persistent Suitor won me over by surprising me with a private
I have two steadfast rules for courtship: Start the date during the day and always say ‘yes’ to diamonds. The first is because I like to keep my options open come nightfall (for my TV shows) and the other is because I like to make new best friends. I don’t need to tell you that I was moved enough to give Persistent Suitor a shot, and though it didn’t work out in the end (he had no sense of
For a person to shout out to the world that they like you takes considerable guts and must contain genuine feelings.
Back during the Cretaceous Period of Truly Rich Courtship (read: pre-smartphone), everything moved at a snail’s pace. A young woman made her debut into society, complicated introductions were completed between a would-be couple, a suitor presented himself to the young woman’s parents and asked their permission to court her, and dating was done under the close watch of a chaperone. It was really a ritual. Maybe it would begin with a traditional moonlit serenade to soften her heart. Then the conversations,
For men, big declarations of admiration were not encouraged and expensive gifts (though greatly appreciated) were reserved until intentions became serious. The reasons? The man didn't want to burden the woman by making her feel she should accelerate her feelings just because there are, say, a thousand roses delivered to her doorstep every day. (Although, that is the purpose of gifts: to make hearts flutter.) Or he didn't want her to think she was the one when maybe he wasn't quite sure yet.
Courtship has become obsolete as its stages have been digitized. The thrill of romance is diminished when everyone does date research through social media.
Which brings us to the news at hand: a billboard in the city that dares asks an actress for a date. Is it romantic or creepy? Is it brilliant or pushing it? My two cents: I have no issues with the medium or the message, including the pun (if you don’t like puns, what’s
The rules of dating have changed so much today. Intentions are declared with a swipe. At-home dates where you can chill (I finally know what this really means—horrors) are in vogue. And juggling options is widely accepted. In short, everything is blunt and quick. Courtship has become obsolete as its stages have been
The billboard declaration has received mixed reactions from the public. There are people who feel that it is dreamy, charming, or brave. I personally feel it is refreshing. For a person to shout out to the world that they like you takes considerable guts and must contain genuine feelings.
For men, big declarations of admiration were not encouraged and expensive gifts (though greatly appreciated) were reserved until intentions became serious.
Then, there are those who call into question the motive and even the character of the man who put it up. Some have even recounted
There is also a question of fairness. Video
I don’t really mind the grand gesture, granted that it is done out of sight like, say, within the confines of a boutique that has been closed just for the two of you. In fact, I would want a love in which these heart-fluttering occasions are possible. I'd want a love who would buy me a red car painted with the message, “You drive me crazy!” (Clark Gable to Carole Lombard), or a love sure enough to leave his throne for (Edward VIII for Wallis Simpson), or a